It Was Not My Whole Life

Posted on July 25, 2016 | 4 comments

For a golfer, it was a dream come true. In 1999, after playing 71 holes Jean Van de Velde led the British Open by three strokes. There was just one hole to play. This was a seemingly insurmountable lead. What awaited at the end of this hole was his name engraved in arguably the most […]

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An Overlooked Discipline

Posted on June 29, 2016 | 4 comments

During a coaching session not too long ago, I received an unusual answer to the question “what do you want to work on today?” My client had worked on several leadership challenges and chose this day to respond “Scott, I don’t have any recreation in my life. I don’t do anything for fun.” He didn’t have […]

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Three Bits of Advice for My Daughter About Relationships

Posted on May 31, 2016 | 2 comments

My daughter is finishing up her freshman year of high school. For her, the experience was  a virtually new beginning, as she was zoned for a school apart from her cohort of friends. Navigating this year has brought new friendships and observing friends enter into ‘romantic’ relationships. While she has not yet expressed interest in […]

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Developing Presence

Posted on April 25, 2016 | 6 comments

Driving on a Florida two-lane road recently, I got behind someone behaving erratically. The car was swerving from one side of the lane to the other. Not maintaining the speed limit, a line of traffic had build up behind this car. Every once in awhile there would be a tap of the brakes for no […]

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Four Obstacles to Gratitude

Posted on March 16, 2016 | 2 comments

When the Israelites turned to Him in their distress, God remembered His people and provided a deliverer for them. By saving them, God was claiming them as His people and extending an invitation for the Israelites to see themselves as His people. God was giving them a new identity. As they followed Moses through the […]

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Ronda Rousey and Identity

Posted on March 2, 2016 | 12 comments

I don’t follow the sport of mixed martial arts (MMA) and I’m not really a fan. But, it has been impossible not to be aware of who Ronda Rousey is. For some time she has been considered the greatest female fighter ever, was sporting an undefeated record, was making the crossover into acting and modeling, […]

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Why Do You Change?

Posted on February 23, 2016 | 4 comments

Human being are dynamic creatures. Every one of us changes in response to situations and circumstances. It is part of how we were designed to adapt. Particularly in response to relationships. To some degree, all relationships challenge our perception of self as competent and worthy of approval. But marriage is unique in the depth of vulnerability […]

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Understanding Your Identity

Posted on February 8, 2016 | 2 comments

Before I understood the importance and power of identity and its relationship to my spiritual life in Christ, I drew a sense of significance from the statements “I am liked” and “I am a pastor.”  These were not just simple descriptors, but rather statements of being that represents facets of my source of identity. My […]

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Make Yourself Available

Posted on February 1, 2016 | 2 comments

The ability to ask open-ended questions and listen with presence is a skill. Good questions have power, not just to garner information, but to change perspective and build influence. Everyone has relationships in which influence must be built and maintained: spouses, children, leaders, teams, students, etc. Questions are a necessary component to growth in all […]

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The Shield of Identity

Posted on January 12, 2016 | 1 comment

As the prophet Samuel’s life was coming to an end, and thus his time as a judge for Israel, the nation asked to have an earthly king. But when they said, “Give us a king to lead us,” this displeased Samuel; so he prayed to the Lord. And the Lord told him: “Listen to all that the people are saying to you; […]

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