Solitude, Silence and Stillness

When speaking before a group of people, it is tough to know if your words have any impact. Certainly if people are asleep you know there has been some impact, but probably not what you were hoping for.

In the moment, if an audience looks engaged or is writing or leaning forward, then I consider that success. Have I had impact? Well at least they made it to the end.

Afterward, there are generally those who come up and praise your words. While I appreciate the encouragement, I don’t use that to grade myself. People who are angry or contemplating deeply and asking themselves new questions probably aren’t in a hurry to display vulnerability to a speaker they just met.

The proverb is “the proof is in the pudding” and my hope and prayer anytime I speak is that people’s perspective would be changed and hopefully that will translate to new ways of thinking and behaving. Seeing themselves and God differently and more truthfully.

The measure of success I look for are those people who respond. Those in whom God has used my words to stir up their spirit and renew their mind. Being someone who enters a church to fill in and give a pastor rest or to do a workshop, I often don’t get to see the results of what I say.

Recently I used a similar message at two churches. The topic was practicing solitude, silence, and stillness. From those two speaking engagements I received numerous email responses about the impact the words have and changes that were made in response.

Concrete next steps.

So, I wanted to share that message. It is 40 minutes or so. It is not perfect. But apparently it spoke something counter to our culture of noise.

You can listen and download it here: Solitude, Silence, and Stillness.

I’m thinking of turning this talk into a workshop with exercises and guidance. Would you be interested in more? Let me know.


I am an author, discipleship coach, and speaker who helps followers of Jesus gain perspective on their identities so they can experience transformation in their decisions, behaviors and relationships and live in freedom. My book Tree of Lies: Transforming Decisions, Behaviors, and Relationships By Gaining Perspective On Your Identity in Christ available on Amazon ( or Barnes and Noble ( Visit for free resources.

Services I offer are one-on-one coaching, group coaching,  speaking at organizations/churches, workshops on marriage/discipleship/leadership, and church retreats. For more info, click here to contact me.

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